I used to be the person who would give of myself to anyone and everyone, just to seek acceptance. To my surprise, when I started intentionally choosing what is best for me and being selective about the people I surround myself with, my circle became much smaller.
People often take you for granted when you consistently show up for them. I always believe that God puts me in certain situations to teach me what not to become. In these past three months, I have learned that when you prioritize yourself, there may be backlash. People may retaliate against you, but it’s not about you. It stems from their deep-rooted rejection and their attempt to make themselves feel better by lashing out with words or even trying to discredit you.
One thing I have learned over the years is that your character speaks for itself. Your character reflects what God thinks of you, while your reputation is based on what others think. So I ask you, which one holds more importance for you?
I’ve experienced people publicly slandering my name and mistreating me in private—all in the name of love or their perception of it. But these experiences haven’t changed who I am; they haven’t defined me, and for that, I am grateful. Living a purposeful life comes with sacrifices and a significant price to pay. Often, it means finding yourself alone. However, at least in those moments of solitude, you know that you are not in the wrong environment, engaging in things that don’t add value.
Life isn’t as challenging as it used to be, and for that reason alone, I am incredibly grateful.
Maya Angelou once said that people will eventually forget what you said but they will never forget how you made them feel.
This quote has been resonating with me as I continue choosing myself. There are certain individuals who bring negativity into my life and make me doubt myself just by their presence. In order to stay focused on my progress and avoid unnecessary distractions, I had to make the tough decision to distance myself from them. I need to keep moving forward!
Never feel guilty about removing toxic people from your life. Do it, and keep doing it until you are fully healed.
With all my love,